


unloved histories

by sandyk



Category: Superstore (TV)
Genre: Amy does not like Kelly, F/M, post ep
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-08
Updated: 2017-12-08
Packaged: 2019-02-12 00:53:27
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,828
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12947778
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sandyk/pseuds/sandyk
Summary: What Amy hated about Jonah was his bad taste. What she hated about Adam was that he started dating before her. (post-ep for 3.07)





	unloved histories

**Author's Note:**

> Not mine, no profit garnered. Amy very nearly quotes the Buffy s3 episode Lovers Walk. Title from Kristin Hersh's Your Dirty Answer.

Amy woke up hungover and tasting chocolate throw up. Merry fucking Christmas day, bitch, she thought. She thought of Adam and just grunted in anger. She should have told him she was dating, too. She grabbed her phone and typed _hey jew_ to Jonah. _Let's go to the mooovies in the tradition of your people_

She took out most of the o's before she hit send. 

Then she saw she had voicemail. Weirdly it was Garrett. He'd called at 1 am, right after they all left the store. "Hey, Amy, I like you more than Jonah so I am violating my own rules. Jonah left with Kelly to go fuck each other, I assume." 

It was a kindness to let her know. She picked up her phone and looked at the text she'd just sent. Her head was pounding. She wrote _fuck nevermind I don't want to take away from you and your new_

She had a twenty second debate. Ho and skank were sexist and wrong. Kelly wasn't exactly as bad as "Bridgie." 

_biggest fan_

Then she hit send. 

She showered and shouted fuck fuck fuck over and over again. What she hated about Jonah was his shitty taste. What she hated about Adam was that he started dating before her, that he was dating exactly the kind of woman he'd dated in high school before her. Apparently Amy was just a short curvy Latina aberration in the parade of skinny white blonde chicks Adam had always wanted. 

She didn't cry until she got her coffee and started driving to her parents'. It wasn't about Adam or Jonah. It was because her head hurt from her hangover. 

She told the whole family about her crazy encounter with Adam. They'd hear about it anyway. Her dad said, "One of Emma's friend's mom? He really wants to make it awkward for Emma, apparently."

"Good point," Amy said. 

Her mother frowned. "How do you think that's gonna sound to Emma when she gets home?"

Amy's brother said, "Emma already knows her mom is very sassy." 

"Sassy won't be the word she uses, but whatever, one day in my life I went a little immature," Amy said. "I'm divorced. Whatever."

"That's not the kind of lesson you want to teach Emma," her mom said. 

Amy's sister said, "Geez, Mom, lay off. Amy doesn't need help to feel bad, going by how she looks."

"Thanks," Amy said, nearly snarling at her sister. "Maybe when I get my tattoo, I'll have it say 'still disappointing.'"

Amy's mom said, "You're not disappointing."

Amy's sister said, "Mom has a tattoo."

"No way," Amy and her brother said at the same time. 

Amy's sister, always eager to tattle, said, "She got it on Emma's birthday, when she was a year old. It's all our names, including Dad and Emma in a heart."

"That's sweet," Amy said. 

"Where's the tattoo?"

"None of your business," Amy's dad said to her brother. "Oh, Amy, I finished that painting of Putin for your friend."

Amy played with her food. After all the gifts and eating, Amy sat on the porch with her brother, both holding a beer. She told him all about the Jonah thing, whatever that was. She shoved her phone at him. "Did he reply to my text?"

Her brother looked at it for an absurdly long time. He said, "Nope, nothing from Jonah. Garrett texted. He says 'thanks for getting Jonah mad at me.'"

"Oh, fuck him, anyone could have told me Jonah left with that idiot." She heard her voice break and she felt pathetic. 

"You didn't ask him out, Sis."

"He's the asshole dating some chick when he's in love with me," Amy said. "I know I'm being an asshole. You think I don't know? But twice in one night, Christmas eve which I was spending alone, guys choose some skinny blonde white girl over me." 

"You and Adam already didn't choose each other and I still don't know why you didn't do it sooner because Adam was a whiny asshole. He's better off with some yoga pants basic girl and her pumpkin spice soap scrubbed butt than someone as fine as my sister," her brother said. 

"Thank you. But why aren't super hot single dads hitting on me?" She was whining. 

"You're too busy stealing snowmen and obsessing over weird hipster guys you work with?" Her brother handed her phone back. 

"It still hurts," Amy said. "Everything hurts."

"You're hungover and also, you have terrible taste in guys." 

"You're so comforting," Amy said, sniffling a little. 

He gave her the typical bro side hug and she let herself be a little comforted. 

The next day she had to work but she made sure Jonah was far, far away from her. Dina came up to her and said, "Did Jonah really do the dirty with that teeny tiny new chick?" 

"That's what I hear," Amy said. 

"Wow, it's like you got ditched twice in one night."

"Except it's not like that at all," Amy said. "Whatever." 

"But you're avoiding Jonah," Dina said. 

"I'm being a petty bitch," Amy said. "I'm disappointed with his choices." She looked up at the security mirror and saw a definite Jonah shape stalking off. So he was listening, so what? She hoped she'd hurt his feelings. 

The only good part of the day was that Emma was home and she was with Amy. "Did your dad talk to you?"

Emma frowned and crossed her arms. "I can't believe he's dating Crystal's mom. It's so gross. Crystal doesn't want to hang out with me and that's fine with me. I don't want him dating my friends' moms."

Amy sighed. "It's hard to meet people as an adult. Your dad did mention I went over there and acted like an idiot?"

"Whatever, he didn't tell you he was dating Crystal's mom. You were upset," Emma said. 

"I made a mistake," Amy said. She hated being a mom sometimes. "Being upset isn't a great excuse. It's okay your dad is dating. He deserves to be happy. And whomever he dates or I might date, it has nothing to do with, like, how much we love you. I was a really bad example. I can admit that. It's okay to admit when you're wrong. And I was wrong."

Emma rolled her eyes. "Were you ever even in love? You just got married because of me." She sounded really bitter and sad and that was definitely the worst Amy had felt in the past three days. 

"We were definitely in love. We loved each other very much. We wanted you so much, even though we weren't expecting you, we did everything we could to give you the best family possible, that we could do," Amy said. "Really. Your dad would say the same thing." Please let Adam say the same thing, she prayed. 

"He did," Emma said. "I just don't know if I believe you guys."

"I just admitted I got drunk and stole a snowman from your friend Crystal's house. I mean, trust me, I wish I could lie to you about things," Amy said. She hugged Emma while Emma would still let her. 

"You lied to me about Santa," Emma said. 

"That's different," Amy said. 

"Where's the snowman?" Emma pulled back. "Can I put it in my room?"

"Are you sure you want to?" Amy smiled. "It was a really stupid thing. And wrong."

"I'll have it as a monument to you," Emma said. "It'll remind me to admit when I'm wrong." She smirked. "Also, it's hilarious that you did that."

"Fine, put it in your room," Amy said. "Cheyenne kept the owl. I don't know why she had three."

Amy had, of course, had work the next day. Kelly was in, too, but Amy was still shift supervisor. She kept Kelly and Jonah on opposite sides of the store and both of them away from her. She didn't really control the break schedule, though, not as much as she liked. She was sitting with Dina, Cheyenne, and Mateo when Kelly came in. 

Mateo said, "Pick another table, shorty."

"I don't understand," Kelly said. She still talked in that annoying breathy fashion. Amy was engrossed in her smoked pork and rice. 

"What's to understand?" Dina frowned. "We don't like you."

"Oh, okay," Kelly said. She went off to eat somewhere else. 

Cheyenne said, "Were we being mean?"

"Yes," Dina said. "But who do you like more? New tiny doll girl or Amy?"

"Obviously Amy," Mateo said. "Not that Amy's not irritating, sorry, sweetie."

"Oh, I'm definitely irritating," Amy said. "Lots of faults here. Maybe we shouldn't be so high school, though. I mean, it's not like she did anything wrong."

"Yes, she did," Dina said. "She's dating Jonah when he's clearly hot for you and sometimes me. And she talks weird. Also, this nothing like how I acted in high school."

"I just graduated high school," Cheyenne said. "This is how I usually act when someone dates a guy my friends had a crush on. Or a guy who clearly had a crush on one of my friends. On the other hand, me and my friends were super popular. So maybe we were bitches. Wow, I never thought about that that way."

"Own it," Mateo said. 

"Are we just being sexist?" Amy frowned. "Are you guy freezing out Jonah?"

"We've all known Jonah for a longer time than that," Dina said.

"Jonah can sometimes be a tolerable okay guy," Mateo said. "Don't you dare repeat that."

"I won't," Dina said.

"See, it's not sexist," Cheyenne said. "If Jonah were dating some guy named Kellen who just started here, we'd all be mean to him, too. I would."

"Same," Dina said. 

"Jonah's too basic to be bi," Mateo said. "But if we were in some fantasyland where that was happening, Cheyenne's right."

"So we're not being sexist, we're being petty bitches," Amy said.

"Exactly," Cheyenne said. "But I mean, I'm barely 18, no one expects more from me."

"Yup," Amy said. "But you are married and a mom."

"Yeah, but Harmonica doesn't know what I do at work. I'm never bitchy to her," Cheyenne said. 

Dina nodded vigorously. 

"My new year's resolution is going to be not to be a petty bitch," Amy said. "And get a tattoo, and take motorcycle lessons. Also, I want to sell the house. But the petty bitch thing is going to be there."

"2018 is four days away," Dina said.

Amy smiled. "Yes, it is."

When her shift was over, she walked to her car. Jonah was sitting on the hood, glaring at her. He said, "So we kiss and you don't talk to me for 60 plus days, and 43 minutes in the car. I kiss someone else and you don't talk to me again. Kind of a mixed message."

"You haven't talked to me either," Amy said, crossing her arms. 

"It was pretty clear how uninterested you were in talking to me," Jonah said.

"But you wait three days to even try," Amy said. 

"This is all my fault," Jonah said, clearly still angry.

"I'm saying, actually, you know what? You've been being kind of a jerk since the tornado. You're an awful roommate to Garrett, which seems out of a character, you're neat, and nice to people or you used to be at work. You cut off Sandra all the time, and you used to actually listen to people. It's not like you were paying any attention to Kelly until Halloween and she started fawning all over you," Amy said. 

"You barely listen to Sandra, you let her go off alone when we set up parking lot buddies," Jonah said. "I'm sorry, do you think I'm having a bad reaction to losing everything I own and no one I know caring?"

"Actually yes," Amy said.

"You're not being a model of kindness lately, either," Jonah said. "You were never nice to Kelly."

"Nope," Amy said. "I never liked her, still don't."

"Yes, you hide it so adequately," Jonah said. "I can't believe you're mad at me."

"Of course I am." She wanted to say they were never friends. She was thinking of an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer. She wanted to say they were never friends, they would never be friends. But she was chicken. As per usual. "You know what, Jonah, never mind. Sorry. You went off to have stupid drunk sex with someone I dislike that same night Adam sprang his barbie girlfriend on me, so I'm probably just overreacting. Sorry for whatever. Get off my car and tomorrow we'll pretend we're friends again."

"I didn't think we were pretending," Jonah said. He got off the car, though. "Aren't we friends?"

"I had a shitty night, Jonah, and a crappy day, and where were you again?"

"My whole apartment and everything I own was gone, Amy, where were you?"

Amy grimaced. "Okay, great, we aren't pretending to be friends then. I'll see you tomorrow."

"Fine, fine," Jonah said. He marched off to his car.

She drove home listening to Adele which was pretty yoga pants pumpkin spice soap of her. She wouldn't tell her brother. 

After she ate with Emma and watched the first Maze Runner movie again, it was the late evening despair time of day. She should get a tattoo. Maybe she could get a stick and poke. Or do it herself. She could totally find a tutorial on YouTube. 

She decided she was going to get an outline of Honduras and another outline of Missouri. Her heritage and the state she'd lived in her whole life and had yet to escape. Maybe on her wrist. Or her hip. 

She found herself googling and at the point where she had a sewing needle in her hand. She needed to get out of the house. She texted Emma to let her know she'd be back if Emma woke up while she was gone and then texted Garrett. She drove over. 

Jonah was waiting outside. He looked exhausted. Amy thought it was probably from spending extended time with Kelly, that had to be exhausting. She sighed. She only had a few days to be a petty bitch, she should be more creative while damning a perfectly nice woman. Who was so super irritating. 

"Hey," she said. "I have a Hanukkah present for you. I actually asked my dad back in August." She got the painting of Putin out of her backseat. "But he didn't finish until last week."

"You asked him in August?" Jonah looked, he looked happy and a little awed as he held it.

"I saw your apartment was destroyed even if I didn't immediately reach out," Amy said. 

"Thank you, this is, this is the best. I can't wait to hang it up when I move," Jonah said. 

"When are you moving?"

"Uh, probably in two weeks, hopefully. I put in some applications over the last few days. Since I've turned into an asshole, apparently," Jonah said. 

"Maybe it will help you be less of a jerk," Amy said. "Putin's watching."

"I love this, by the way. It feels really good to have something back," Jonah said. "Wait a minute, I got you something, too."

He went inside with the painting and came back with an envelope. He handed it to her and she opened it. "A gift certificate for a mud wrap," Amy said. "That's awesome."

"You know, treat yourself. It's not the spa near the store, because that one has some really troubling yelp reviews. This place is better."

"I've never seen that show, you know, treat yourself," Amy said. She recognized the name of the spa, Jonah had spent a lot. "How can you afford this?"

"It's a great show, you should totally watch it. I bet you and Emma would love it. And uh, I manage my money really badly. I spend way too much," Jonah said. "It's horrible, I just figure my parents will bail me out and they've done it, more than once."

"Okay," Amy said. She smiled at him. "Thank you."

"Friends again?" He looked so very very tired. 

"Of course," she said. "We were both just angry and being jerks, right?"

"Right," Jonah said. "Can you, uh, it's not fair people are being mean to Kelly."

"You want me to do something?"

Jonah shrugged and tugged at his fingers. Amy said, "Tuesday. I'll do it, Tuesday."

"Okay," Jonah said. "Thanks for the painting. Thanks for thinking of me this summer."

"I was," Amy said. "Thanks for the mud wrap. See you at work." 

She drove off and didn't feel great, per se. She felt better. Then she started picturing Adam in bed with that Barbie and saying Amy's name when he came. She smirked. She bet Jonah did it, too. She could picture that, too. She even giggled a little. She was a great CrAmy petty bitch. At least until Monday.


End file.
